And now, here’s a word from your favourite Bethlehemites.
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 Acne Sufferer / Saviour of Mankind “I am so not awkward at all! Well, except for the awkwardness of that previous sentence. And how I act around girls. I’m actually pretty clumsy, too, come to think of it. But I’m totally confident and graceful when I’m having a tea party with my stuffed animals. Darn… I wish I hadn’t said that. This has become totally awkward.” |
 Lothario / Master of Disguise “Mary had a little lamb, it’s fleece was white as snow. I gotta tap that shit!” |
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 Mule / Fool “People say I have an ass-inine sense of humour! Get it? If not, maybe you need to mule it over a bit! Get it again? I’m just trying to bring a bray of sunshine into your life! Get it now? No? Looks like I’m burro-ing myself a big hole here!” |
 Care-giver / Milk-giver “So I stay out late! Sue me! Whose business is it how long it takes me to get home anyway?” |
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 Jerk / Jerk “I don’t like you or the horse you rode in on. But especially you.” |
 Father / Carpenter / Tiddlywinkler “Most surreal step-father scenario ever!” |
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 Mother / Housewife “Everybody thinks I’m so perfect, but actually I’m not. See, I’m capable of fibbing! And paradoxes.” |
 Cheerleader / Object of Affection “I like baby animals, unicorns, and martyrs.” |
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 Genius / Swirlee-Receiver “The geek shall inherit the earth.” |
 Prankster / Preppie “Two-tone hair and sweaters with your initials on them is so where it’s at.” |
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 Principal / Christ-Hater “This troublemaking Jesus isn’t getting away with anything on my watch. But Barabbas: there’s a good kid.” |
 Idolater / Aviation Enthusiast “Dude, this is so meta that it’s blowing my mind!” |
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 Teacher / Adventurer “Actually, I wasn’t one of the NBA’s premier power forwards in the 70’s & 80’s - you’re thinking of Moses Malone.” |
